Posts tagged Music

Better late than never, eh?

Top 10 Songs of 2011 

1. “Tigers” Steven Malkmus and the Jicks 
2. “Shake Me Down” Cage the Elephant 
3. “Powa” Tune-Yards
4. “Our Hearts Are Wrong” Jessica Lea Mayfield 
5. “Ice Cream” Battles 
6. “Aroused” Tom Vek
7. “Miss K” Deer Tick 
8. “Stone Rollin” Raphael Saadiq 
9. “Midnight City” M83 
10. “Bedroom Eyes” Dum Dum Girls  

Top 10 Albums of 2011 

1. “21” Adele 
2. “Nostalgia, Ultra” Frank Ocean 
3. “Bon Iver” Bon Iver 
4. “Whokill” Tune-Yards 
5. “Riptide” Beirut 
6. “This Modern Glitch” The Wombats 
7. “Zonoscope” Cut Copy 
8. “Ukulele Songs” Eddie Vedder 
9. “Angles” The Strokes 
10. “We’re New Here” Gil Scott-Heron & Jamie XX 

Songs That Almost Made It

• “Need You Now” Cut Copy 
• “Someone Like You” Adele 
• “Yonkers” Tyler the Creator 
• “Good Feeling” Flo Rida 
• “Somebody I Used to Know” Gotye (feat. Kimbra) 
• “Junk of the Heart” The Kooks 
• “Shaking All Over” Wanda Jackson 
• “Booty City” Black Joe Lewis and the Honeybears

Mafia Wars or Farmville

Name: Lynn, age 47, Part time administrative assistant, Mary Kay sales person

Your Life: You like to eat Doritos while watching The Biggest Loser and other shows about fat people getting skinny. You also really love Bejeweled and often lose track of time while playing one of these games on Friday nights, causing you to miss whatever plans you didn’t actually have. You don’t really care though because you’re wearing that white, hoodless sweatshirt with a picture of kittens playing in a basket. Ha ha, gee wiz, that sweatshirt is just the best.

The Sims

Name: Chloe, age 14 and a half, High school freshman, 3.67 GPA, 3rd chair french horn in orchestra

Your Life: One time your cousin asked you if you wanted to smoke weed and you blushed, put your hand (in the shape of an “L”) up to your forehead, and ran to your room so you could journal about how hard it is growing into a strong, independent, drug-free woman. The Sims makes you feel in control and productive. However, you also blush when your Sims make out. 

Nike + GPS or any other fitness tracking app

Name: Nathan, not Nate, age 28, Account Exec. at a small yet profitable local advertising agency

Your Life: Right now you’re super busy training for your 3rd Ironman in as many years. Marathons just weren’t a challenge anymore. You have an automatic car starter, you say “Bullshit” a lot, and you’re in between girlfriends at the moment because all girls are crazy. 

Scrabble or Words with Friends

Name: Christofer (with an F), age 23, Bartender, drummer/founding member of a band called “That One Time”

Your Life: You snagged a four-year degree from a private liberal arts college on the East Coast, but you decided to follow your musical calling. You’re mom is pissed about it, and you’re a little embarrassed when you see high school classmates at the bar, but,  to be fair, you majored in art history, so you weren’t really being serious about it anyway. You like playing Facebook Scrabble with your 9-to-5 friends because you feel super validated winning against someone who regularly submits themselves to The Man. You’re much free-er than they are.

• Neatly stacked chopped wood
• Not taking your depression too seriously
• Looking out windows
• Sneaking whiskey into your hot cocoa
• Cry/singing
• Candid Instagram photos of you smoking a cig while rolling up your shirt sleeves
• Dew
• Being understated
• Teetering on the edge of “noticeable balding”

• Accept my Hello Kitty obsession for what it is: kitschy and adorable. Buy me things to feed the beast that is said obsession.


• Call me “Auntie Kel” when I’m holding your baby who I’m in no way related to. Not just anybody can be an honorary Aunt, you know. Oh… they can?


• Compliment my outline-of-the-state-of-Minnesota tattoo. Say I was definitely the first one to get it and, thus, started the fad.


• Make me cookies and then tell me I’m skinny and pretty while I eat them.


• Refer to my blog/twitter/musical taste as awesome and underrated.


• Make fun of other people with dreadlocks. Tell me that you realize I’m one-of-a-kind and a special exception to the dreadlock stereotype.


• Mention how you bet I could do more push ups than you. I’m up to like 12 in a row, FYI *kisses bicep*.


• Invite me to your wedding and give me a +1. This is a two-fer: You not only want me at your special day, but you also assume I might have a boy to bring. I probably won’t, but I appreciate the thought.

A - #AwwHellNo

B - #BrainerdWorkVaca
Atleast the hotel had cookies at the front desk. OH WAIT, THEY WERE OUT. Fuckin’ Brainerd. 

C - #ClassicGoobs
For boogers? 

D - #DontYouDareWoofAtMe
For dogs? 

E - #EffThisNose
I think I probably meant “noise?” If not, I was actually unaware of my apparently subconscious hatred of my schnoz.

F - #FrankOceanSwoonyPants
I mean, right?

G - #GrandOldDay
Don’t ask me, I don’t seem to remember anything. #TooManyMimosas 

H - #HeckYes
I refuse to believe that Napoleon Dynamite quotes are finished. 

I - #IWannaDie
Every Saturday/Sunday morning. 

J - #JustSayin
I “just say” a lot of stuff. 

K - #KelseyFact
No one cares, Kels. 

L - #LAWLZ

M - #MyFeetFeelFatDotCom
Just one of those days, ya heard? 

N - #NowPlaying

O - #OffBeats
In reference to my annoying french horn parts when playing in Family Band, a twice annual familial music group formed by all my cousins, aunts/uncles, sisters, parents, and Grandpa on the tuba. We play Christmas carols in Dec. and Sousa marches in July. We suck.

P - #PizzaLuceBlockParty
Little did I know that the cool kids were tweeting sans the “pizza” at #LuceBlockParty. 

Q - #QuestionablePoopLikeStainOnSidewalk
Outside the CVS in Midway. Don’t know why I was surprised, being that I was at the Midway CVS and all. 

R - #RomanticFrenchHipHopSwag
Talking about MC Solaar, tryin’ to be cool. You know how it is.  

S - #SweatySwag
This is what I have after I got for a run and have convinced myself that I still look/smell just fine. 

T - #TeenSanta
A Shane Shane song you must know. 

U - #UTJUSYhahahhaha
This was obviously some sort of “hilarious” acronym I came up with while drunk. 

V - #VaginalInterpretation
??? 

W - #WineDrunk
What else is new, eh? 

X - I have no hashtags saved in my phone that start with “x.” Suggestions?

Y - #YuckBuckFuckCluckDuckMuckTRUCK
♥ rhyming. ♥ trucks.

Z - #ZebrasWhatWhatInTheButt
Apparently I was pretty stoked to see my striped friends at the Como Zoo. 

The Smith Westerns played at the Triple Rock several months ago. It was a little too hip and non-dancie, so @jking26, @lizzietru, and I tried to stir things up.

We were also a little drunk and took approx 37 photos for our “future album cover” in the bathroom. We decided on this one because it says “We’re funny and sorta pretty and we’ll surprise you with our levels of ROCK.” P.S. None of us can play an instrument. Actually, I was 2nd chair french horn in high school, so…

My tweets will tell you absolutely nothing about how the show was. Read them if you so choose.